books

We don't always choose the books we read.
Sometimes they choose us.

Lesra in The Hurricane

I love nicknames. I remember being jealous of Susan’s family. Everyone had a nickname. Nana. GiGi. Kick-a-boy. Nicknames are intimate and personal. In the best case scenario, you are nicknamed by someone who knows you and likes you. They are terms of endearment. I like that we call Alex Xander, and that Leslie calls me Sharnin. My dad calls me Curly and neither one of us knows why.

In middle school, Coach Page called me Red, and I liked it. Sam David called me Stop Sign, because I was straight up and down with red on top. I didn't like that so much. In high school, Susan and I were the Seatbelt Sisters - an insult aimed at our good girl tendencies and ahead-of-our time buckling up. In college, it was Pebbles. In optometry school, Carter. In the Philippines, I am Chan. I don't think they have the sh sound.

But my all-time favorite nickname came from my brother Steve. He calls me Books. I love it, because it fits. It makes me feel known and loved. I am always in the middle of at least 3 books. It is usually more like 5. My favorite categories are fiction, spirituality, and psychology. I will not live long enough to read everything I want to read, so I am hoping for a library in heaven. And a beach. And a dance floor.

My spiritual journey (of self-awareness, others-awareness and God-awareness) is inextricably linked to books. They expand my heart and mind in a way that a conversation might not. They make me care about things that I wouldn’t necessarily choose to think about. They bring insight and comfort. They are catalysts for transformation. I so often want to put books in the hands of others, because books have brought me meaning and joy. They have helped me grieve (A Grace Disguised) and given me hope (Bold Love). They have drawn my heart to God and to people I don’t necessarily like or find easy to love. Books help me clarify how it is that I want to be in the world.

I just finished reading My Name is Asher Lev, and it made me love Orthodox Jews, Families, Artists, and God. It is a beautiful book. I ached as I read it and found it to be True with a capital T. I’ve heard people say, “All truth is God’s truth.” I have no idea who said that first, but it resonates with me. I believe where there is Goodness there is God. I believe that God is Love. So anywhere I see Love, I see God. Asher Lev is a beautiful story about love. Thanks, Kristie!

I found The Secret Papers of Eastern Jewel on Grace Kelly’s former yacht while cruising in the Galapagos Islands. I liked it, but it was hard to read. It intermingles glorious sensuality and surprising courage with deep depravity and dysfunction. It paints an intriguing picture of a life that flows out of great harm, subjugation, and abandonment. I was appalled by the treatment of women by the Chinese and Japanese elite less than a century ago. It is a story of use and abuse. It speaks of excess, perversion, cruelty, and betrayal. It is heart-breaking and truth-telling. There is a sense of repentance and a stream of honest regret. Something about it rang true. And I had compassion for a woman, Eastern Jewel, that I might have hated had I known her. I could still see her shimmering self and I longed for her redemption. I felt love for her, and that was good for me. It was a story about mercy.

Has a book ever changed your life? As we say in the South, do tell. I’ve listed some Books I Couldn’t Put Down (on the right, scroll down) if you are in the market for a good read. Many of these have landed in my life as gift from a friend or a title I saw and somehow knew I had to read. I feel like they chose me.